Like a hampster on a wheel

Every few months I find myself feeling anxious. Brimming with ideas. Shopping on a binge. Desire for... something. It's my creativity trying to find an outlet. I know it and realize it but yet I do nothing about it.

Used to, editing some pictures would satisfy it. Now, not so much. I have so many ideas and dreams it's ridiculous. Everything sounds like something I want to and can do. I'm so close to buying various machines or renting store space it's not even funny. I've got to find an outlet before I make a decision which will quickly drown me.

My days look like this:
  • 5:30am - alarm goes off.
  • 5:45am(ish) - I get out of bed, shower, do hair & makeup
  • 6:10am - wake Carter, change his clothes & diaper, nurse
  • 6:30am - wake C.
  • 6:40am - put Carter on the bed to hang out while I get dressed.
  • 6:50am - finish helping C get various bottles and bags together.
  • 7-7:05am - leave the house
  • 7:45-7:50am - arrive at daycare and leave my baby for the day. Multiple kisses ensue.
  • 8-8:05am - arrive at work and watch the clock.
  • 4:45pm-5pm - leave work to pick up Carter
  • 5:45-6pm - arrive home
  • 6pm-8:30pm - feed and play with Carter. Hopefully have dinner.
  • 8:30pm-10pm - fix bottles for the next day. Watch some tv. Try not to fall asleep in mid-sentence.
  • 10pm(ish) - lights out.

I'm not complaining- don't misread. It's just that I need more sleep. I crave it. But it never fails - I never get it. Adding anything else to this routine will mean I get even less. Yet.... I. want. more.


Cristal said...

Once Carter gets a bit older, you'll add more 'exciting' things to your schedule- 5 pm: take Carter to the park and watch him charm all the ladies; 6 pm: Let Carter help make dinner, etc. Saturday- have the day to myself while C takes Carter fishing. Or whatever. It's only the first few months that you really feel tied down and stuck in a rut, IMO.
Hope you feel better about things in general soon. (Not that you feel bad now... you know what i mean.)

mmk8007 said...

AND you have to wake a sleeping baby??? I feel your pain! On the bright side, Mr. Carter is THE cutest ever!

Dawn Renee said...

Can I just say that I'm totally impressed that you can shower, do your hair, and makeup in 20 minutes! I get up at 5:30 and only have myself to get ready and to work by 7!
Carter, though, is so cute and lucky to have a mom as loving as you!