35 weeks

I think we're doing alright here at 35 weeks.  I've slowed down a lot and my husband picks up a ton of slack.  But, all in all, I'm ok. 

Carter is almost 19 months old.... unbelievable.  He's grown so much and is such a big boy.  I'm so proud and just a little bit smitten.  I sure hope Small Fry measures up!


Where is the easy button?

As of today, I'm 33 weeks pregnant.  That means there's seven weeks left til my due date and about 6.5 weeks til my c-section.  I'm not terribly uncomfortable yet, although I think I did have some contractions yesterday due to maybe not getting enough water and maybe the super spicy Chinese food I had for lunch.  Or, maybe the baby was just pushing my belly in new and painful positions.  Who knows.  I probably wouldn't know a contraction if it bit me on the ass, even though I had a few (verified by the monitor) after my water broke with Carter, prior to the c-section.  In any case, my hips don't hurt, my boobs aren't sore, I'm sleeping fine and my general discomfort is more from my size than anything. 

Since I'm updating on the status of the baby, my doctor felt around on Tuesday and said she thinks he's probably breech too.  Apparently, my kids are ready to face the world head on-- and butt first.  Ha.  My c-section is tentatively scheduled for August 30 at 7:15am.  I'm getting ready to fax in my FMLA paper work -- everything is getting close....  it snuck up on me. 

At home, I've done nothing.  Nada.  Zilch.  Zero.  I haven't washed baby clothes, nor have I even organized them.  The biggest thing I haven't done is prepare a nursery or even clean out the room that will be the nursery.  And believe me, it needs cleaning out.  Currently, it's full of junk from the house that we stashed in there when we laid the tile in the kitchen/office.  With Carter, I was crazy pregnant hormone lady who HAD to have a nursery ready to go-- and then we didn't use it until he was maybe nine months old.  I know the new baby will sleep in our room, too so I'm not stressed about having a nursery all ready to go, but I do need somewhere to put clothes away and stash extra diapers. 

I had a baby shower at my mom's this past weekend and got some lovely things.  My kids are so blessed to have people who care so much for their parents and them- even before birth.  We're so spoiled, and in turn blessed to the highest degree.

I'm still searching for the easy button when it comes to making childcare decisions for Carter.  His daycare situation is better, but I have no plans to take him back there after my maternity leave, nor will the new baby go there.  I've toured a daycare closer to home that I would like to enroll him in while I'm on leave so he can get out of the house and do something instead of being stuck with a grouchy, sleep-deprived mom 24/7.  He deserves better than that!  I also have a friend in the town I work that is keeping kids in her house now who said she'd be happy to keep him until I go on leave if things go south at my current daycare-- but I worry that the changes would be too much for him to handle.  Not only am I potentially ruining his life by giving him a brother, but I don't want him to think I'm shuffling from here to there to there because I don't want him.  I know it's silly and he'd probably adjust just fine, so I'm blaming my hormones.  In any case, I'm finding it incredibly hard to make any decisions regarding him right now.  The thought of upsetting him hurts my heart. 

Also, what if I go in to labor prior to my scheduled date?  That's very probable since Carter came 2.5 weeks early and my scheduled date is only three days before my actual due date.  In a perfect (miserable) world, everything would go exactly as planned and my mom would stay at the house with Carter while we left in the wee morning hours to go have a baby.  By the time he woke up, we'd be ready for him to visit and he'd be able to play til his heart was content with his grandma (who is way more fun than mom and dad).  But, if that doesn't happen, I guess we just take him to the hospital with us.  And if no one can get there in time to watch him, I'll go through a c-section alone while C is with Carter.  It won't be the end of the world, but it's causing me anxiety.  I told C last night that I'm more concerned about making sure Carter is happy and cared for than I am about giving birth.  My how priorities change.